Love is Exhausting

I thought everything was fine with us

Moments of acceptance and trust

The novelty of simple kisses

The warmth of your radiating touch

Casual words weren’t much

Only your presence is what I missed

But why? Lately I feel us growing distant

Your smiles and affection have the same intent

So it’s me-me that’s closing myself off

I grow icy and cold, afraid of love’s existence

My heart still beats and drums for you

But my mind says no

My chest opens up like a book for you

But my mind says no

My eyes are flooded with tears for you

But my mind says no

My mind says no

It says no

It says love is too exhausting

Too contrasting, too connecting

Love is exhausting

I’m the one at fault?

No, it’s you who made me this way

I closed myself off for you, so you’d go

I closed my heart to wish you away

I grew tired of this love war

And you grew tired of me and my sores

But truthfully, I wanted you to stay

I was scared of being unlovable

With you being so lovable

I wanted to give you more but wasn’t able

With you giving me more than you were able

What the hell is wrong with me?

Disgusted with myself, I had to push you away

Telling you to love another one day

Still, I want you to stay

I love you, but that’s all I have

That’s all I have to give you-my love

I don’t want to give you away

…I don’t want to give you away

But my mind says no

My mind says no

It still says no

It says love is too exhausting

Too contrasting, too connecting

Love is exhausting