Most of my inspirations when it comes to writing comes from the music and groups I listen to. Admittedly, I have a keen interest in Japanese and Korean culture and so I listen mostly to Japanese pop and rock music with the odd Korean group thrown in. Most of my poems have sprinkles of their influence here and there.
I have been listening to Japanese music regularly since the start of middle school so I’m more biased towards my Japanese groups than any Korean group I have encountered. The reason being is that I have only been listening to Korean music for a couple of years now and I only listen to two on a regular basis, so no, I’m not a rabid K-pop fan. Sorry if that disappoints. Though rather I like to admit it or not, both groups have had a great amount of influence on me.
Still, I wish people tried out their music especially Japanese music since I feel K-pop has been on the rise greatly but their neighbors seem to be struggling to claim a similar stardom.
Anyways, the little list of influences is as followed in no particular order…
- Aqua Timez
- Asian Kung-fu Generation
I’d like to thank all the groups for working hard in getting themselves out there enough to influence so many people like me. A loser like me feels unworthy to even like them and be inspired to express myself this way.
No, it isn’t wrong to love. To even think such a sentiment is actually quite upsetting. Still, certain situations have caused some of us to think such thoughts despite how irrational it can be. The love I’m talking about here is the romantic type of love, not the familial type of love related between parent and child or close relations. It is slightly maddening to think how simple love can be yet how intricate it unravels to be due to our perception and misgivings about our own feelings. Maybe it’s due to loving someone who you know loves someone else or maybe your love interest is also being loved by a close friend of yours. Or maybe due to your circumstances, you feel inadequate to love someone in a higher position or standing than you. And yet, we can also point out physical and personality differences that can make you feel limited and annoyed with yourself for even fancying the idea of loving this person, let alone allowing your emotions for him or her to run free.
Yet, I still believe that no matter your position, status, appearance, personality, and other such barriers, there is no reason you should feel the way you do. No one should make you feel inadequate or limited by supposed obstacles such as these. Just love. It is better than the alternative of suppressing your emotions and turning into an apathetic mess because no matter how hard you try to cast aside your emotions, they always strike back in full force when you least expect it. It is easy to be embarrassed by them and worry over how others will perceive you. But you know what? Who cares? What do they matter to you in your life? Ultimately, it is your decision and your feelings. It is your own way of thinking that shouldn’t be set to some other person’s standards only fail to reach the bar. In this society, we should love who we choose without feeling abashed or disgusted with our own feelings. But then again, perhaps it is just me.
Is it wrong to love? Yes, for me it is. That is my own self-imposed enigma I have embedded in my thoughts. It is hypocritical, I know. But I feel as if my inadequacy and self-worth as a human is too low to properly love someone else. I can’t. Someone who looks like me, thinks like me, does like me should not love someone such as that. And so, I desperately try to purge my emotions because I do not see a need to have them when I know I will only feel incredibly stupid in the end. What a loser I am. Is there anyone else out there who shares the same sentiments? But I guess not.
Thank you for reading this far if you did.
Is it wrong to feel like this? Is it wrong to love like this?